Weird factoids!

So I realized the other day that the age difference between the last 2 guys I slept with is actually 15 years. Whoa.
And yes, the older man was infinitely better, even if the younger one was hotter.

So bees, what news! Apparently noone has done it since October. Lies!

Other weird facts to add?

Oscar time

Does anyone else look at the Oscars, and wonder whether people do inappropriate things with the statuettes when they get home? They kind of look like they would be ok for that sort of caper, as compared to say, this

Long Time No Bees

Hi guys!

Wow I've missed so much bee action! You have been buzzing like crazy here. I couldn't even check Bees while I was away cos I was using PVC's laptop and didn't want to leave anything incriminating in the internet history.

Agent Y: Very sorry to hear about the cockhead. And also sorry to hear about the freaky coincidence with sushi sister of China Bee. Freaky! Thought I was the only one who had unbearably awkward coincidental experiences!

Agent X: Speaking of coincidences - OMG! Bungalo 8 Bee!!! Wow, how bizarre! And I love the line about standing in the corner but looking hot. Go you lol.

Agent V: Ahahaha crack wax. Awesome. I've never been brave enought to get my vagina (lol) professionally waxed. I mean, I have a genital piercing, but even that was easier than getting it all off for a waxer. Not sure why, but that terrifies me. I just shave it. Piece of trivia: PVC shaves himself too. I watched him do it the other day - fascinating! He has to stretch his bits out to access it properly. Kind of hilarious.

As you know, I've been living it up in NYC, and I've had a blast. Lots of sexy sex, omg so much. One day we had sex in the morning, and then when we got back we had sex three more times.

Also had awesome adventures in all the sex shops over there. PVC and I bought matching rubber underpants, so we can be stylish next time we take our clothes off at a fetish event. And I got a new (purple) corset, for the bargain price of US $50!! PVC took some lovely photos of me in it (and the underpants)... it even gives me cleavage! Cleavage, people!!

Also, I think I might be working at the sex shop in Newtown after all. They ditched me initially because they hired someone who could start sooner, but that girl is now talking about moving to Byron Bay. So I start in January! Yaaay!!!

See you all soon, except Agent V - bummer we didn't quite make it with the meet up! But hopefully see you again not too distant future.

Bees out.

Crack Wax

Hi all,

Has anyone had a brazilian? I have not, but I feel a little like I may as well have. Really, all I am short of one is a couple of labia and a teepee at the top.

Just had a 'bikini' wax from an no-nonsense big momma named Keisha. (Lovely, but also a bit scary)

She was almost shocked when I was slightly confused - "What, remove my undies too? Everything? I..I just want the bikini..." then she just went with the 'mnnmm-hmmm' approach and off they went.

Legs went flying, initially I was going for a timid trim, apparently this isn't the go. Typically, it would be 'hold your leg there'...'no, there' (I put leg up off to my right a bit, and up a bit, she re-positions so my leg is up near my shoulder somewhere, somewhere at the extreme of my flexibility) Repeat.

As I was there in the chair with my both ankles held above my head and stretching my tummy up for all I was worth, I couldn't help but feel the situation was a little weird, but I didn't wail when next she put hot wax on my intimates and then ripped the hair out, either. Go me! At least she was nice and quick about it.
As I was give leave to get dressed again she patted me on tha arm and said that it's the best way, only doing the outlines leaves 'all that' down there and that's just not nice. he he. I kind of agree with, but still. Aii!

I think the exposure factor here was actually worse than having your vagina examined for whatever reason - last sexual health clinic I went to they were like 'oh, this guys new, do you mind if he does your tests and I supervise' so there's 3 people peering up your clacker. At least they give you a piece of paper towel to put down when they wander off so you can pretend you've got a skirt on or something. Here I was nude from the waist with legs akimbo and NAKED VAGINA pointed at the door.(closed) {OK, probable excessive use of word vagina there, but it gets addictive.}

Ah the indignity of it all! Beats trying to wax yourself though. (Highly unrecommended)

PS. ...Vagina

*sings* Blind date, ma-ma-mah Blind date!

WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?

These people who decide to 'introduce' (read 'set up') you to thier brother/cousin/ex boyfriends friends half brother, whatever.

Sitting at work today, when I get 'click'... look up looking bewildered etc, and one of the reps says 'I need a photo of you, for my brother. I've told him about you, and he wants a picture!'
To which I reply, in an oh-so-intelligent manner 'Ahhh'
'He's 26, tall, good looking, plays, rugby, owns his own house...' all this crap is sounding really appealing until then it dawns on me, and is also related to a loud mouthed woman who sets people up with thier brothers etc - BAD!

But as Sister Bee of Agent X, he might be a good lay? Huh well I suppose but that's boardering on shitting where one eats I think, and if nothing else this little blog excerise has taught us that is to be avoided at all costs (refer fat IT bee.)

Speaking of beebloggers, Agent X where are you? We know that my shag has just boarded a slow boat to bloody China, and Agent Billy is as last post suggests is having more sex and orgasms than one can poke a stick at.
Surely you are having hot martial sex on patio, stairwell or similar?

LMAO- when's she's *just not that into you*

Cyanide & Happiness @ Explosm.net

100th Post!!

We made it girls!! We may be sporadic, but we got there in the end!!!

They really ARE hot pants!!!

These pants are awesome. I am the proud owner of a pair!
A bit sticky on the dancefloor but what the hell. I am always sticky on the dancefloor anyhow.

Dreambee freaked out on the phone when I told him of my purchase, though more when I told him of my intentions to wear them out in public..... woooo!
Digest of antics coming soon :o)

Of all the gin joints

Space is big, really big and like other large empty spaces it collects a bit of rubbish, space junk from various Apollo missions and land fill jettisoned into space.
Like outer space, cyber space is infinitely huge. You can do everything online, buy clothes, shoes, the Hollywood sign, food, talk to people from the other side of the world and date people without bellowing over pub music. But it’s also when I discovered the cyber space dating junk!
Deciding to consider a sortie into internet dating wasn’t that hard, without having to join up I could go window shopping for potentials all while sitting in my pj’s!
Then I saw them. Not one skeleton in the cupboard but two!
And one of them StandUp Bee! The outrage! !!!
Looking at his ad, it looks like some disgruntled ex (not me) has hacked his account and rewritten his profile. That or, he IS incredibly screwed up and has the self esteem of a bison.
The second one is BestFriendsEx Bee. With whom I had a one night stand with his friend in his living room (not my finest hour clearly), and then last year (or maybe the year before??) had a fling with another of his mates RedHead Bee.
After some deliberation and then reconsideration I’ve posted the DropKick Bees photos which have been blurred to protect the not so innocent.

Alleged Sister Bees

Haha, I mean YOUR sister you silly bee, and Agent Z's sister too.
Glad you like the colours :) Other, what say you?

Croatian (why, oh why! do I never use spell check) Non Verbal Bee was sooo last year Darhlinggg. I met him at Bacteria Foam Party NYE 05, obviously this was never going to reap a quality bee but he had really good shoulders… so…
We hooked up, and foolishly attempted to extend the shelf life of our fling. But he didn't speak. I tried, persevered with conversation, and he was well intentioned apparently just not very bright.

Not to mention, I had been projecting anxieties about being stood up from StandMeUp Bee onto him which undoubtedly was going to doom things.

Plus fooling around in his little Nissan Pulsar was logistically unpleasant… so unless he rings me from Melbourne asking for bail from his Racial Affray charges I doubt he’ll be attending Boxing Day this year.

Misc

Sister bees! I know not of the sister bees!!?????

Love this colour scheme. SO much.

hahahahah Croation (sic) Bee!!! hilarious. However do you find them? So a long and lasting romance to follwo then eh? He be at Christmas this year?

Well as you're all aware now (due to my insistent requests to add) that I am a myspace freak now too. I need a new job. *sigh*
Good news that I have an interview tomorrow though : ) yay!
Zogg if you happen to still be reading this blog against my advisement, that's a secret, please don't tell anyone.
: )

OurSpace

Yes friction burn... not good, second only to the notion of possibly activacting some sort of machinery and have my ass stampped into the shape of a car bonnet.

It's true.
We're involved in one giant, global orgy to which you're not invited to Agent X! BWAHAHA
It's somewhat addictive when you encounter a cool myspace blog... I wonder if GFYS has a myspace? *searches... nothing found *pout*

In other news - when watching the news last night, I caught a report about the Serbs and Croats fighting at the Australian Open... this was my internal monologue:

'Gee, look at all those silly boys, running about with their silly flags... hmm that guy looks familiar. Oh there he is again... HMM he is familiar looking. OH DEAR.'

Seems like Familiar looking Bee and Croation NonVerbal Bee (whom I tried to extend my NYE fling with from last year) were one in the same.
Super!

What what....???

I have just realised, I won't say discovered because thats not really the word I want now is it? That's why I said realised. I have just realised that I am the only Bee without a myspace! You're alll whoring around on myspace being friends without me!

Resolutions

Hey hey, yes we've got resolutions too. Weight loss goals too. I've never really made a resolution before so don't know how successful we'll be. : ) Good luck to you!!! Have you got a strategy?

Any NYE action anyone? UK Bee?

New format

Bah! I'm not a fan. But that's because it's all Red and we know where I stand there.

Sending our love

Sending our love to our beloved Bee who lost Pixi this morning, she may have been run over by a car it may seem.
Hope you're ok sweetie
*big hugs*
xxx

Hell No, Motherfuckers

Agent Y! You are damaging my sensitive eyes with your rampant profantiy. Don't you know there are LADIES in here? (Best if you think Little Brittain - 'Laaaadies'!)

I'm just trying to keep an element of class here in IAYB. Cock heads.

Shameless excitement sharing

I tried to write something good here but the problem is I don't actually have anything particularly exciting to say. I just got laid for the first time in AGES and wanted to share! (You know how it is in a drought - sometimes you begin to worry it may NEVER RAIN AGAIN)

So. Wooooooooo!
Over and out!

Agreement, Etc

Newbeee. Ha. That's as far as the puns go I'm sorry. I'll have to skip straight to buns. He. Didn't say anything about poor use of other literary devices though did I! Haw haw.

But to the Point. I personally think our friend el stripperio is looking with well-concealed amusement at the way centre strip dude suddenly doesn't fit his jeans post show, sans sock-down-pant-itude. Seriously a balled up pair (oh it seems I lied about the puns.... so shoot me!) of knee highs would have certainly held up those jeans to the required height. OR maybe it's a look of disdain at said lack of socks and the subsequnt lack of professionalism that it implies.

To the second point. Hello beemunchers! Not much to report on at the second except a fair excitement at potential second date with nightclub guy, who is thankfully far better looking than he was in my memory, and exceptionally well built. Woo! Stay tuned - I intend to explore the issue further! Any beekeeping rules I need to stick to? Anything too banal, too staid? Lemme have it before I go killing the blog with boring detail otherwise left to a quadruple repeat after too many drinks!!!!

Like in the magazines

If BeesAgents would care to avert thier eyes upward they shall notice, a random photo taken at the strip show we partook in.

You may not be able to see properly, so I indicated this like they would in the magazines, but the guy on the left is looking sneakily out the corner of his eyes totally checking the other stripper!

More power to him! Maybe he 'forgot the steps.'

Anyway greetings to Agent Z! Now we have a full ships compliment on board, I'm sure we can make our way through to the proper smut lol (no really.)

Go Agent X, getting down on it in the new place. Don't want to see any sneaking about post ceremony!